people always say we should be with someone who loves us for who we are and who won’t try to change us, even in spite of our shortcomings. and while i agree that it’s important to find someone who can understand our flaws and embrace our fundamental personality, i don’t…
I know what I want, how I want it & what it takes to get it. But, more importantly, what to do to keep it mine. I think most people forget that just because you have something or even someone for the time being, that they won’t ever be without it. But it takes work to make it worthwhile - consistent work, that is.
That’s what makes the difference in making things last.
“To return to love, to get the love we always wanted but never had, to have the love we want but are not prepared to give, we seek romantic relationships. We believe these relationships, more than any other, will rescue and redeem us. True love does have the power to redeem but only if we are ready for redemption. Love saves us only if we want to be saved. So many seekers after love are taught in childhood to feel unworthy, that nobody could love them as they really are, and they construct a false self. In adult life they meet people who fall in love with their false self. But this love does not last. At some point, glimpses of the real self emerge and disappointment comes. Rejected by their chosen love, the message received in childhood is confirmed: Nobody could love them as they really are.
Few of us enter romantic relationships able to receive love. We fall into romantic attachments doomed to replay familiar family dramas. Usually we do not know this will happen precisely because we have grown up in a culture that as told us that no matter what we experienced in our childhoods, no matter the pain, sorrow, alienation, emptiness, no matter the extent of our dehumanization, romantic love will be ours… They show up just as we imagined they would. We wanted the lover to appear but most of us were not really clear about what we wanted to do with them— what the love was that we wanted to make and how we would make it. We were not ready to open our hearts fully.
The only thing I really wish to do with my life is to inspire someone. I want to touch someone's life so much that they can genuinely say that if they have never met me then they wouldn't be the person they are today. I want to save someone; save them from this cold, dark, and lonely world. I wish to be someone's hero, someone that people look up to. I only wish to make a change, even if it's a small one. I just want to do more than exist.